Adventures in Cat-Sitting, a Play in One Act
Peter sits at the table, trying to work. He is grumpy and irritable after being woken two hours early by a deranged cat yowling at the bedroom door. The Cat jumps on the table and sits on the computer keyboard. Peter moves The Cat. Peter: What do you want, cat? The Cat: Feed me, mortal. Peter: Dude, I fed you ten minutes ago. You ate. There is no more food. The Cat: FEED ME. Peter: No. The Cat: I stare at you. Peter: Totally cool with me. The Cat:I stare with mighty stareness. Peter: Huh. The Cat: FEEL THE WEIGHT OF MY DISPLEASURE Peter: Got it. Trying to work. The Cat: I savage your toe. Peter: Fuck. Shit. Rack off, I was using that. The Cat: FEEEEEEEED ME! Peter: TRYING TO WORK. The Cat: Holy shit, there’s birds in the yard. Peter:They’re chickens. They’re there every day. You know this, because I pull you away from their pen every morning.
