Day: July 16, 2010
Conspicuous Acts of Cultural Consumption

I Write Like

Bugger who I write like*, when presented with a tool of complex literary analysis such as this I can think of only one sensible thing to do with it. And now I give the you the results of my most important and detailed analysis: When you plug in the lyrics to Sir Mix-a-Lot’s Baby Got Back, you get: I write like J. D. Salinger I Write Likeby Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing! And this amuses me no end. Poor Holden Caulfield – if only he’d learned to dial 1-900-mix-a-lot, his life could have been very different**. So can we all go back to the infinately more interesting 30 Days of Television meme now? * I tried Horn, got “You write like Jane Austen”, then figured we were done. ** Of course, on further reflection, it makes perfect sense. No-one understands poor Holden and who understands those rap guys anyway?

PeterMBall 16/07/2010
Works in Progress

Conversations with Works In Progress

Act One: Yesterday’s Short Story Idea Peter sits at Fritz the Laptop, planning his writing time for the day. WIP: Oooo, I haz a title. Peter: Go away, I’m meant to be working on my novel right now. WIP: “The Unicorns of Suffragette Three” Peter: … Peter: No. I will not be lured. Aroynt. WIP: (sing-song and tempting) I have an op-en-ing par-a-graaaaaph. Peter: You do not. WIP: Yes, actually, I do. Look it’s this. (Whispers in ear) Peter: … WIP: See? Peter: I hate you. WIP: You really don’t. Peter: … Peter: Fine. Lets talk. WIP: Good. Peter: So… WIP: I wish to be long. Peter: How long? I mean, crap, I don’t have time to write something long right now. You can have five thousand words, I think. I’d really like it if you’d fit into five thousand words. Six at the outside. WIP: I want more. Peter: How much more? WIP: I want…ten thousand. Peter: Eight. WIP:

PeterMBall 16/07/2010